The doctor was called one evening for an urgent surgery. He answered the call, rushed to the hospital in minutes & went directly to the surgery theatre.
The boy's father, waiting in the hall for the doctor, yelled at the doctor on seeing him, "Why did you take all this time to come? Don't you know that my son's life is in danger? Don't you have any sense of responsibility?"
The doctor smiled & said, "I am sorry, I wasn't in the hospital & I came as fast as I could after receiving the call...... And now, I wish you'd calm down so that I can do my work".
"Calm down?! What if your son were in this room right now, can you calm down? If your own son dies now what will you do??" said the father angrily.
The doctor smiled again & replied, "I will say what "Job" said in the Holy Bible: "From dust we came & to dust we return, blessed be the name of God". Doctors cannot prolong lives. Go & pray for your son, and we will do our best."
"Giving advices when we're not concerned is so easy" Murmured the father. The surgery took some hours after which the doctor came out happily, "Thank goodness! Your son is saved!"
And without waiting for the father's reply he was heading for the door. "If you have any question, please ask the nurse!!"
"Why is he so arrogant? Can't he wait a few minutes so that I ask about my son's condition?" Commented the father to the nurse.
With tears in her eyes, the nurse said, "His son died yesterday in a road accident, he was in the burial when we called him for your son's surgery. And now that he saved your son, he is getting back to his son's burial."
Tags: Doctor, Surgery
Showing posts with label Inspiration. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Inspiration. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 01, 2012
Friday, October 07, 2011
Stay Foolish, Stay Hungry
Stanford Commencement address delivered by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, on June 12, 2005.
I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That’s it. No big deal. Just three stories.
The first story is about connecting the dots.
I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?
It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: “We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?” They said: “Of course.” My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.
And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents’ savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn’t see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn’t interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.
It wasn’t all romantic. I didn’t have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends’ rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:
Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn’t have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can’t capture, and I found it fascinating.
None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, it’s likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.
Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
My second story is about love and loss.
I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.
I really didn’t know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down – that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.
I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.
During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple’s current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.
I’m pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn’t been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.
My third story is about death.
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn’t even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor’s code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you’d have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.
I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I’m fine now.
This was the closest I’ve been to facing death, and I hope it’s the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:
No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.
Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960′s, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.
Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: “Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.” It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.
Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.
Thank you all very much.
I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That’s it. No big deal. Just three stories.
The first story is about connecting the dots.
I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?
It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: “We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?” They said: “Of course.” My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.
And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents’ savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn’t see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn’t interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.
It wasn’t all romantic. I didn’t have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends’ rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:
Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn’t have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can’t capture, and I found it fascinating.
None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, it’s likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.
Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
My second story is about love and loss.
I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.
I really didn’t know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down – that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.
I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.
During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple’s current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.
I’m pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn’t been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.
My third story is about death.
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn’t even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor’s code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you’d have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.
I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I’m fine now.
This was the closest I’ve been to facing death, and I hope it’s the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:
No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.
Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960′s, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.
Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: “Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.” It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.
Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.
Thank you all very much.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
The Tablecloth
Something nice for you to read ....... beautiful story.... makes you understand that things happen for a reason
--------------------------------------
The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry, to reopen a church in suburban Brooklyn, arrived in early October excited about their opportunities. When they saw their church, it was very run down and needed much work. They set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve.
They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc, and on December 18
were ahead of schedule and just about finished.
On December 19 a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days.
On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sank when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 20 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high.
The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone
the Christmas Eve service, headed home. On the way he noticed that a local business was
having a flea market type sale for charity, so he stopped in. One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover the hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church.
By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus. She missed it. The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later.
She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area.
Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet. "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?" The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria.
The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten "The Tablecloth". The woman explained that before the war she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria.
When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. He was captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again.
The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home. That was the least he could do. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a house cleaning job.
What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return.
One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't leaving.
The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how
could there be two tablecloths so much alike?
He told the pas tor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for her safety and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a prison. He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years between.
The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride. They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier.
He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on
the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine.
--------------------------------------
His love is always with you. His promises are true, and when we give Him all our
cares we know He will see us through.
So when the road you're traveling seems difficult at best, just remember I'm here
praying and God will do the rest.
Tags: Suburban Brooklyn, Staten Island, Tablecloth, Nazi, Austria
--------------------------------------
The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry, to reopen a church in suburban Brooklyn, arrived in early October excited about their opportunities. When they saw their church, it was very run down and needed much work. They set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve.
They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc, and on December 18
were ahead of schedule and just about finished.
On December 19 a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days.
On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sank when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 20 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high.
The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone
the Christmas Eve service, headed home. On the way he noticed that a local business was
having a flea market type sale for charity, so he stopped in. One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover the hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church.
By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus. She missed it. The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later.
She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area.
Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet. "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?" The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria.
The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten "The Tablecloth". The woman explained that before the war she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria.
When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. He was captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again.
The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home. That was the least he could do. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a house cleaning job.
What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return.
One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't leaving.
The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how
could there be two tablecloths so much alike?
He told the pas tor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for her safety and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a prison. He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years between.
The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride. They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier.
He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on
the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine.
--------------------------------------
His love is always with you. His promises are true, and when we give Him all our
cares we know He will see us through.
So when the road you're traveling seems difficult at best, just remember I'm here
praying and God will do the rest.
Tags: Suburban Brooklyn, Staten Island, Tablecloth, Nazi, Austria
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Discover Your Calling
Read 1 Corinthians 12:4-27 (Based on Gordon Smith's Courage and Calling and Yoke Yeow's idea with Incredibly Called) Delivered at RipTreat 2009.
If you can be a superhero, who would you want to be? Why do you want his or her super powers?
Do you remember the movie The Incredibles? Or Kungfu Panda? Or Ratatouille? The heroes of each story have a deep desire in their hearts to be superheroes, a chef (Remy the Rat) or kungfu master (Po The Panda), they face huge internal and external problems that prevent them for realizing their dreams and we cheer them on when we see how they finally overcome these barriers to be what they were meant to be!
Each and every one of us is given special talents, skills, abilities and a calling from God. Not all of us have the same spiritual gift. Why? It’s supposed to be like a body when we mutually build up and bless each other with the diverse gifts we have been given. Since we cannot be experts in everything, we need each other…
First and foremost, God calls us to Himself, to a personal Father-child relationship with Him. He loves us unconditionally, there is where our self-worth lies. Secondly, He has also equipped us with abilities and called us to fulfil a purpose, mission and destiny in life.
What happens when we don’t exercise our gifts or we don’t know what God has called us to do with our lives? When people don’t discover what God had made them to be, they very often experience these symptoms
Boredom: Mr Incredible is super-strong and loves to fight crime and save people from trouble. But when he was forced to retire by the law, he earns a living filing claims in an insurance company. He’s cramped in a tin can and sneaks out at night to play super hero.
Mischief: Do you remember Dash? Wonder-boy capable of supersonic speeds but to hide his superpowers, he can’t show his true colors in school. So he must pretend to lose races in school to conceal his abilities. In frustration, he expresses his talent by putting thumb tacks teacher's butt. When people can’t express their abilities in positive, productive ways, these gifts can have a dark side.
Inferiority Complex: Violet the shy, insecure girl whose gift of invisibility helps her fade ever more into the background. When you don’t find your call or purpose in life, you may eventually believe you are good for nothing. There is no meaning or rhyme in life… you get overwhelmed with self pity, inferiority and insecurity.
Mismatch of work: I would also like to suggest to you that because many people do not discover the true superpowers, they choose a certain job or study certain subjects because everybody else is doing it, it makes lots of money or due to society expectation or because it is easier road to take. We dun stop and ask:
Is this “who I am”? Is this what God has called me to do?
Disclaimer: If you are in secondary school, this is probably not the time for you to make firm decisions on what you’d be doing for the rest of your life. So don’t go home and tell your parents “I’m not going to school anymore because I wanna go US and be American Idol”. It is a lifelong journey. You won’t find out the entire purpose of your life tonight. At your age, I want to encourage you to try new things, dun limit your ministry experience and continuously learn more about you like/dislike but it’s never too early to start thinking about these things.
What I like about movies like Kungfu Panda, Incredibles or Ratatouille is not so much the silly humor or kick-butt action, what satisfies us most is when they find the joy of finally doing what they were made to do. Like when Remy the rat creates delicious dishes instead of scavenging leftovers or when Po the Panda finally defeats the bad guy by being himself and he finds out that the secret of the dragon scroll is “There is no secret!” we cheer for these heroes.
What are you spiritual gifts? Freely you have received, freely give. A Hero is waiting to be set free in us. Only One Life To Live. Don’t Waste It.
But how do we find out what is God’s will for us? What are our spiritual gifts? Must we hear audible voices from heaven before we know it? Is there a secret spiritual formula to finding God's call? The secret of the dragon scroll is "there is no secret".
It’s not something overly difficult or mysterious. In fact, after this we will do a little survey together to help you find out more about your spiritual gifts. Would you like to find out? (Disclaimer: The purpose is to get you started on discovery not absolute answers because unless you have tried some of these ministry areas, how do you know you don’t like it or good at it? The answers will change as you explore and learn more)
Here are FIVE Questions to help us find our Life Calling
1) What do you feel joy doing? What is my deepest desire or passion?
It doesn’t mean that just because you enjoy playing Counterstrike, you are called to be a gamer. But since God put the body together, you will feel fulfilled (Yes, I feel God’s pleasure when I run, sing, write, play the guitar, serve the weak etc) when functioning in the proper area. There will be a sense of purpose, like jigsaw puzzles that fit. Look out for the sense of fulfillment, satisfaction, pleasure when you exercise a gift/ministry.
2) What are you good at doing? What are my abilities, skills, spiritual gifts, mutant powers?
Run through some of the gifts and talents in the spiritual gift survey. It's not an exhaustive list. Maybe you think “Oh, I’m good at none of these things.” But again: “Belum cuba belum tahu”. Risks: When people ask you to serve as ushers, “Oh no, because I don’t have that gift”. You begin to avoid evangelism or prayer. And at this time, none of us have enough life experience to really know what gifts you have, Some people would rather die than say, sing in public, but when they are given training and opportunity they may turn out to be gifted singers. So explore new opportunities. Get involved in different church ministries to meet the needs of some real people, expose yourself to the needs around and see if God puts a burden in your heart.
3) What do you feel are the biggest needs of the people around you?
When you look at the world around you, what are the things that make you sad or lose sleep? Are you burdened by the suffering of poor people? Are you burdened to see that people are lost without the gospel? Do you feel angry when there is injustice or cruelty? Of course, all Christians should feel such burdens in some degree. But it’s also true that some people feel more strongly about some areas than others. And it’s okay, dun fight over it and accept that God calls people differently while learn from others. Evangelism (Alpha Course) versus Social Justice? (Angsana) Don’t insist others to be like you. Have you felt like: “Why isn’t somebody doing something about it?” Maybe you should.
4) What is your unique personality?
God has wired each of us differently, in a unique way like snowflakes. There is no “right” personality. Our individual temperament is unique to us as our fingerprint. John Calvin once said: You cannot know God unless you know yourself. You cannot know yourself unless you know God.
- Extroverts are energized by being with people or enjoy being the center of attention. Introverts tend to be content and energized being alone, and avoid attention when in a crowd. Which is more true to who you are?- How do you process information? Am I more inclined to trust clear, certain and concrete facts (sensate) or more inclined to trust intuition, gut feeling and imagine possibilities (intuitive)?
- Do you make decisions depending on logic/analysis or personal relationship/feeling? Thinker or feeler?
- Am I more inclined to live with order, structure and routine or do I prefer going through life with more variety, spontaneous changes? Different personality may clash in a meeting. Derive fulfillment from finishing a task or find more joy in the process?
Again, your calling is not determined by one factor. For example: “Unless you are an outgoing extrovert, you cannot be a leader” – too simplistic. There are different leadership styles, a quiet person can lead effectively also.
5) What do others in school, family, circle of friends, church community say about me?
Since spiritual gifts are designed to benefit others (edify each other), you should see positive results as you exercise these gifts. But results take time so don’t give up too quickly, give it a fair try. Sometimes it’s hard to be brutally honest with ourselves – we can be either too hard on ourselves or unable to see our own shortcomings. So we need other brothers and sisters in Christ to help us recognize and confirm our gifting. Cannot ‘syok sendiri!!’ And as a youth group, be on the lookout and encourage those who do well, affirm them to continue using their gifts, be generous in giving honest feedback and constructive suggestions or evaluations.
But you can’t consider this question alone: Sometimes even people who mean well may misunderstand us, may be biased and their feedback cannot be absolute. We need to weigh opinions of others carefully as well. Usually some truth, some exaggerations…
So there you have it: Five Questions to help you discover your calling in life
What do you feel joy doing? What are you good at doing? What do you feel are the biggest needs of the people around you? What is your unique personality?
After doing the survey:
Beware of ‘gliding on our gifts’. Sometimes our relationship with God is not that healthy or our hearts are not right (bear grudges or hatred on others) but we can still do well in our ‘ministry’ because we are gifted in it and nobody notices. Your gift can never replace what goes on inside your heart. “Lord! Lord! Look at what we have done for you” But I never knew you. (Matt 7:21) There are people who are not so gifted but because their character is godly and their relationship with God is close, people are blessed and sense the aroma of Christ in their lives.
Our gift, ability or ministry is not an extension of ourselves. It is not where your source of self-worth. Unless you see this, you’d be driven or scared, too timid or too aggressive.
If we measure our self-worth by our achievements and abilities, we will either burn out (“I must be the best otherwise I’m a failure”) or give up (“What’s the point? I’d never be good enuff”).
But the good news is Christ “loves us more than we ever dare imagine even though we are more sinful than we’d ever know”! How does that change the way you measure how valuable you are and how you use gifts? Humble boldness…
I hope this message gets you to start thinking over the next few days we are together. What is the kind of person God has called me to be? What are the needs around me that I could me in Jesus name? What gifts have he given me to bless others and glorify God?
Remember Spiderman movie: With great powers come great responsibility! Let us pray.
Tags: Discover Your Calling
If you can be a superhero, who would you want to be? Why do you want his or her super powers?
Do you remember the movie The Incredibles? Or Kungfu Panda? Or Ratatouille? The heroes of each story have a deep desire in their hearts to be superheroes, a chef (Remy the Rat) or kungfu master (Po The Panda), they face huge internal and external problems that prevent them for realizing their dreams and we cheer them on when we see how they finally overcome these barriers to be what they were meant to be!
Each and every one of us is given special talents, skills, abilities and a calling from God. Not all of us have the same spiritual gift. Why? It’s supposed to be like a body when we mutually build up and bless each other with the diverse gifts we have been given. Since we cannot be experts in everything, we need each other…
First and foremost, God calls us to Himself, to a personal Father-child relationship with Him. He loves us unconditionally, there is where our self-worth lies. Secondly, He has also equipped us with abilities and called us to fulfil a purpose, mission and destiny in life.
What happens when we don’t exercise our gifts or we don’t know what God has called us to do with our lives? When people don’t discover what God had made them to be, they very often experience these symptoms
Boredom: Mr Incredible is super-strong and loves to fight crime and save people from trouble. But when he was forced to retire by the law, he earns a living filing claims in an insurance company. He’s cramped in a tin can and sneaks out at night to play super hero.
Mischief: Do you remember Dash? Wonder-boy capable of supersonic speeds but to hide his superpowers, he can’t show his true colors in school. So he must pretend to lose races in school to conceal his abilities. In frustration, he expresses his talent by putting thumb tacks teacher's butt. When people can’t express their abilities in positive, productive ways, these gifts can have a dark side.
Inferiority Complex: Violet the shy, insecure girl whose gift of invisibility helps her fade ever more into the background. When you don’t find your call or purpose in life, you may eventually believe you are good for nothing. There is no meaning or rhyme in life… you get overwhelmed with self pity, inferiority and insecurity.
Mismatch of work: I would also like to suggest to you that because many people do not discover the true superpowers, they choose a certain job or study certain subjects because everybody else is doing it, it makes lots of money or due to society expectation or because it is easier road to take. We dun stop and ask:
Is this “who I am”? Is this what God has called me to do?
Disclaimer: If you are in secondary school, this is probably not the time for you to make firm decisions on what you’d be doing for the rest of your life. So don’t go home and tell your parents “I’m not going to school anymore because I wanna go US and be American Idol”. It is a lifelong journey. You won’t find out the entire purpose of your life tonight. At your age, I want to encourage you to try new things, dun limit your ministry experience and continuously learn more about you like/dislike but it’s never too early to start thinking about these things.
What I like about movies like Kungfu Panda, Incredibles or Ratatouille is not so much the silly humor or kick-butt action, what satisfies us most is when they find the joy of finally doing what they were made to do. Like when Remy the rat creates delicious dishes instead of scavenging leftovers or when Po the Panda finally defeats the bad guy by being himself and he finds out that the secret of the dragon scroll is “There is no secret!” we cheer for these heroes.
What are you spiritual gifts? Freely you have received, freely give. A Hero is waiting to be set free in us. Only One Life To Live. Don’t Waste It.
But how do we find out what is God’s will for us? What are our spiritual gifts? Must we hear audible voices from heaven before we know it? Is there a secret spiritual formula to finding God's call? The secret of the dragon scroll is "there is no secret".
It’s not something overly difficult or mysterious. In fact, after this we will do a little survey together to help you find out more about your spiritual gifts. Would you like to find out? (Disclaimer: The purpose is to get you started on discovery not absolute answers because unless you have tried some of these ministry areas, how do you know you don’t like it or good at it? The answers will change as you explore and learn more)
Here are FIVE Questions to help us find our Life Calling
1) What do you feel joy doing? What is my deepest desire or passion?
It doesn’t mean that just because you enjoy playing Counterstrike, you are called to be a gamer. But since God put the body together, you will feel fulfilled (Yes, I feel God’s pleasure when I run, sing, write, play the guitar, serve the weak etc) when functioning in the proper area. There will be a sense of purpose, like jigsaw puzzles that fit. Look out for the sense of fulfillment, satisfaction, pleasure when you exercise a gift/ministry.
2) What are you good at doing? What are my abilities, skills, spiritual gifts, mutant powers?
Run through some of the gifts and talents in the spiritual gift survey. It's not an exhaustive list. Maybe you think “Oh, I’m good at none of these things.” But again: “Belum cuba belum tahu”. Risks: When people ask you to serve as ushers, “Oh no, because I don’t have that gift”. You begin to avoid evangelism or prayer. And at this time, none of us have enough life experience to really know what gifts you have, Some people would rather die than say, sing in public, but when they are given training and opportunity they may turn out to be gifted singers. So explore new opportunities. Get involved in different church ministries to meet the needs of some real people, expose yourself to the needs around and see if God puts a burden in your heart.
3) What do you feel are the biggest needs of the people around you?
When you look at the world around you, what are the things that make you sad or lose sleep? Are you burdened by the suffering of poor people? Are you burdened to see that people are lost without the gospel? Do you feel angry when there is injustice or cruelty? Of course, all Christians should feel such burdens in some degree. But it’s also true that some people feel more strongly about some areas than others. And it’s okay, dun fight over it and accept that God calls people differently while learn from others. Evangelism (Alpha Course) versus Social Justice? (Angsana) Don’t insist others to be like you. Have you felt like: “Why isn’t somebody doing something about it?” Maybe you should.
4) What is your unique personality?
God has wired each of us differently, in a unique way like snowflakes. There is no “right” personality. Our individual temperament is unique to us as our fingerprint. John Calvin once said: You cannot know God unless you know yourself. You cannot know yourself unless you know God.
- Extroverts are energized by being with people or enjoy being the center of attention. Introverts tend to be content and energized being alone, and avoid attention when in a crowd. Which is more true to who you are?- How do you process information? Am I more inclined to trust clear, certain and concrete facts (sensate) or more inclined to trust intuition, gut feeling and imagine possibilities (intuitive)?
- Do you make decisions depending on logic/analysis or personal relationship/feeling? Thinker or feeler?
- Am I more inclined to live with order, structure and routine or do I prefer going through life with more variety, spontaneous changes? Different personality may clash in a meeting. Derive fulfillment from finishing a task or find more joy in the process?
Again, your calling is not determined by one factor. For example: “Unless you are an outgoing extrovert, you cannot be a leader” – too simplistic. There are different leadership styles, a quiet person can lead effectively also.
5) What do others in school, family, circle of friends, church community say about me?
Since spiritual gifts are designed to benefit others (edify each other), you should see positive results as you exercise these gifts. But results take time so don’t give up too quickly, give it a fair try. Sometimes it’s hard to be brutally honest with ourselves – we can be either too hard on ourselves or unable to see our own shortcomings. So we need other brothers and sisters in Christ to help us recognize and confirm our gifting. Cannot ‘syok sendiri!!’ And as a youth group, be on the lookout and encourage those who do well, affirm them to continue using their gifts, be generous in giving honest feedback and constructive suggestions or evaluations.
But you can’t consider this question alone: Sometimes even people who mean well may misunderstand us, may be biased and their feedback cannot be absolute. We need to weigh opinions of others carefully as well. Usually some truth, some exaggerations…
So there you have it: Five Questions to help you discover your calling in life
What do you feel joy doing? What are you good at doing? What do you feel are the biggest needs of the people around you? What is your unique personality?
After doing the survey:
Beware of ‘gliding on our gifts’. Sometimes our relationship with God is not that healthy or our hearts are not right (bear grudges or hatred on others) but we can still do well in our ‘ministry’ because we are gifted in it and nobody notices. Your gift can never replace what goes on inside your heart. “Lord! Lord! Look at what we have done for you” But I never knew you. (Matt 7:21) There are people who are not so gifted but because their character is godly and their relationship with God is close, people are blessed and sense the aroma of Christ in their lives.
Our gift, ability or ministry is not an extension of ourselves. It is not where your source of self-worth. Unless you see this, you’d be driven or scared, too timid or too aggressive.
If we measure our self-worth by our achievements and abilities, we will either burn out (“I must be the best otherwise I’m a failure”) or give up (“What’s the point? I’d never be good enuff”).
But the good news is Christ “loves us more than we ever dare imagine even though we are more sinful than we’d ever know”! How does that change the way you measure how valuable you are and how you use gifts? Humble boldness…
I hope this message gets you to start thinking over the next few days we are together. What is the kind of person God has called me to be? What are the needs around me that I could me in Jesus name? What gifts have he given me to bless others and glorify God?
Remember Spiderman movie: With great powers come great responsibility! Let us pray.
Tags: Discover Your Calling
Thursday, October 30, 2008
What Goes Around Comes Around!
One day a man saw an old lady, stranded on the side of the road, but even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out. His Pontiac was still sputtering when he approached her.
Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn't look safe; he looked poor and hungry.
He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was that chill which only fear can put in you.
He said, "I'm here to help you, ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan Anderson."
Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt.
As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was only just passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid.
Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk. The lady asked how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her. She already imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not stopped. Bryan never thought twice about being paid. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were plenty, who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way.
He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance they needed, and Bryan added, "And think of me."
He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the twilight.
A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant.
Outside were two old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn't erase. The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered Bryan.
After the lady finished her meal, she paid with a hundred dollar bill. The waitress quickly went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, but the old lady had slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be. Then she noticed something written on the napkin.
There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote: "You don't owe me anything. I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I'm helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let this chain of love end with you." Under the napkin were four more $100 bills.
Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard....
She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whis per ed soft and low, "Everything's going to be all right. I love you, Bryan Anderson."
Tags: Inspiration, Mercedes, Pontiac, St. Louis, Bryan Anderson
Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn't look safe; he looked poor and hungry.
He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was that chill which only fear can put in you.
He said, "I'm here to help you, ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan Anderson."
Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt.
As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was only just passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid.
Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk. The lady asked how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her. She already imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not stopped. Bryan never thought twice about being paid. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were plenty, who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way.
He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance they needed, and Bryan added, "And think of me."
He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the twilight.
A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant.
Outside were two old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn't erase. The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered Bryan.
After the lady finished her meal, she paid with a hundred dollar bill. The waitress quickly went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, but the old lady had slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be. Then she noticed something written on the napkin.
There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote: "You don't owe me anything. I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I'm helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let this chain of love end with you." Under the napkin were four more $100 bills.
Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard....
She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whis per ed soft and low, "Everything's going to be all right. I love you, Bryan Anderson."
Tags: Inspiration, Mercedes, Pontiac, St. Louis, Bryan Anderson
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
People With a Difference
- Name the ten wealthiest men in the world.
- Name the last ten Heisman trophy winners.
- Name the last ten winners of the Miss America contest.
- Name eight people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer prize.
- How about the last ten Academy Award winners for best picture or the last decade's worth of World Series winners?
How did you do? I didn't do well either. With the exception of you trivia hounds, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday too well. Surprising how quickly we forget, isn't it? And what I've mentioned above are no second-rate achievements. These are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.
Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one.
- Think of three people you enjoy spending time with.
- Name ten people who have taught you something worthwhile.
- Name five friends who have helped you in a difficult time.
- List a few teachers who have aided your journey through school.
- Name half-a-dozen heroes whose stories have inspired you.
Easier? It was for me, too. The lesson? The people who make a difference are not the ones with the credentials, but the ones with the concern.
(Take this Quiz by Max Lucado)
I wish to live a life that will impact the lifes of others in a positive manner.
Tags: People With A Difference, Positive Impact, Inspire, Worthwhile
- Name the last ten Heisman trophy winners.
- Name the last ten winners of the Miss America contest.
- Name eight people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer prize.
- How about the last ten Academy Award winners for best picture or the last decade's worth of World Series winners?
How did you do? I didn't do well either. With the exception of you trivia hounds, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday too well. Surprising how quickly we forget, isn't it? And what I've mentioned above are no second-rate achievements. These are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.
Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one.
- Think of three people you enjoy spending time with.
- Name ten people who have taught you something worthwhile.
- Name five friends who have helped you in a difficult time.
- List a few teachers who have aided your journey through school.
- Name half-a-dozen heroes whose stories have inspired you.
Easier? It was for me, too. The lesson? The people who make a difference are not the ones with the credentials, but the ones with the concern.
(Take this Quiz by Max Lucado)
I wish to live a life that will impact the lifes of others in a positive manner.
Tags: People With A Difference, Positive Impact, Inspire, Worthwhile
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
The Non-Growing Seed
A successful business man was growing old and knew it was time to choose a successor to take over the business. Instead of choosing one of his directors or his children, he decided to do something different. He called all the young executives in his company together.
"It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO," he said. "I have decided to choose one of you."
The young executives were shocked, but the boss continued. "I am going to give each one of you a seed today - a very special seed. I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from the seed I have given you. I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one I choose will be the next CEO."
One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story. She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed.
Every day, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown. After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow. Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew.
Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing. By now, others were talking about their plants, but Jim didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure.
Six months went by - still nothing in Jim's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing. Jim didn't say anything to his colleagues, however. He just kept watering and fertilizing the soil - he so wanted the seed to grow.
A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company brought their plants to the CEO for inspection. Jim told his wife that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. But she asked him to be honest about what happened.
Jim felt sick at his stomach. It was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, but he knew his wife was right. He took his empty pot to the board room. When Jim arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by the other executives. They were beautiful--in all shapes and sizes. Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed. A few felt sorry for him!
When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives. Jim just tried to hide in the back.
"My, what great plants, trees, and flowers you have grown," said the CEO. "Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!" All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered the financial director to bring him to the front.
Jim was terrified. He thought, "The CEO knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!" When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his seed. Jim told him the story.
The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives, "Here is your next Chief Executive! His name is Jim!"
Jim couldn't believe it. Jim couldn't even grow his seed. How could he be the new CEO the others said? Then the CEO said, "One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead - it was not possible for them to grow.
All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. "When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the new Chief Executive!"
The moral that you have learnt?
Tags: Moral, Chief Executive, CEO, Seed, Boiled Seed, Honesty
Friday, July 18, 2008
The Law of the Garbage Trucks
How often do you let other people's nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day?
Unless you're the Terminator, for an instant you're probably set back on your heels. However, the mark of a successful person is how quickly she can get back her focus on what's important.
I learned it in the back of a Harare city taxi cab. Here's what happened. I hopped in a taxi and we took off for Westgate. We were driving when all of a sudden a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his breaks, skidded, and missed the other car's back end by just inches!
Here's what happened next. The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. How do I know? Ask any Zimbabwean, some words in Harare come with a special face.
Now, here's what blew me away. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!"
And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck."
Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they'll dump it on you. When someone wants to dump on you, don't take it personally. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You'll be happy you did. I guarantee it.
So this was it: The "Law of the Garbage Truck." I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home, on the streets? It was that day I said, "I'm not going to do it anymore."
I began to see garbage trucks. Like in the movie "The Sixth Sense," the little boy said, "I see Dead People." Well now "I see Garbage Trucks." I see the load they're carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my Taxi Driver, I don't make it a personal thing; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and I move on.
One of my favourite football players of all times, Ronaldinho, does this every day on the football field. With a smile he always jumps up as quickly as he hits the ground after being tackled. He never dwells on a hit. Ronaldino is always ready to make the next play his best. Good leaders know they have to be ready for their next meeting. Good parents know that they have to welcome their children home from school with hugs and kisses.
Leaders and parents know that they have to be fully present, and at their best for the people they care about.
The bottom line is that successful people do not let Garbage Trucks take over their day.
What about you? What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more garbage trucks pass you by? You'll be happier. I guarantee it.
Wonderful people are created by God. Wonderful moments are carefully planned by God. And wonderful friends like you are carefully chosen by God.
Tags: Law of Garbage Trucks, God, Harare, Taxi Driver
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Something to Ruin Your Day
- of being angry and choice
"Whoa," yelped junior disciple Ah Lek in surprise. "Arrgh!" shouted junior disciple Ah Kow as senior disciple Ah Moo pushed his way between them and sent both of them falling off the straight and narrow path that leads to the Sow Lin monastery chapel. Ah Kow fell to the left into a bush of yellow daffodil. "Wow," he thought, "the sky is so blue." "Ouch, ouch" shouted Ah Lek who fell to the right into a rose garden.
"I so hate senior disciple Ah Moo," said Ah Lek as he extricated himself from the thorns. "He makes me so angry" "Leave him be. He just a big bully," said Ah Kow as he dusted his robe clean."I am so furious. One day I will get even. Vengeance is mine said the Lord, and Ah Lek will be My instrument," Ah Lek told Ah Kow. "Hey, don't simply quote the Bible. No play, play, you know," replied Ah Kow in alarm, waiting for a thunderbolt to strike."I am still angry" said Ah Lek to Ah Kow during supper that evening in the refectory.
Paused in the act of placing a piece of meat into his mouth, Ah Kow blinked and said. "You're still angry?" "Yeah, I am so angry that I cannot enjoy my meat." The disciples have just finished their meat-week where they fast from eating meat for two weeks before Lent. "See there. I can't stand it. That bully is enjoying himself," said Ah Lek pointing to the senior disciple table where Ah Moo just cracked a joke and all the other senior disciples are laughing.
"I can't stand being in the same room as him!" "Didn't Our Lord teach us to forgive and forget?" Ah Kow pointed out. "Forgive, yes. Forget, no" declared Ah Lek with firm conviction. "Aah...?" Ah Kow tailed off in confusion. "I am so angry that I didn't sleep a wink last night," declared Ah Lek to Ah Kow as they meet the next morning for prayers. "I was thinking of all the ways I can cheket his scrawny neck." "You're still at it?" asked Ah Kow sleepily.
"What about St.Paul's teaching about not letting the sun goes down on your anger?" "That don't count," said Ah Lek smugly, "Somewhere in the world, the sun is always shining so it can never go down on my anger. Maybe I shall get a big stick and hit Ah Moo on the head. Do you think he will forgive me?" "Donno," said Ah Kow cautiously as he slowly back away.
"Aiyuh , my stomach hurts," yells Ah Lek as he rolled on his bed later that day. "Let me fetch Abba Ah Beng" said Ah Kow as he hurried to his sifu's room. Abba Ah Beng called in the services of Abba Thomas who is a bivocational Abba. His other vocation is as a doctor. "He has a gastric ulcer," said Abba Thomas after he finished his examination, "I wonder what brought this on?" "Must be his anger," whispered Ah Kow.
"What anger?" thundered Abba Ah Beng who has superb hearing, especially for the dinner bell. "Ah Lek has been angry at senior disciple Ah Moo since he pushed us into the bushes yesterday!" Ah Kow said, pointing his skinny finger at Ah Moo. "I did?" Ah Moo sounded surprised. "Yes," Ah Moo said after a moment's pause. "That was in the morning when I was rushing for the toilet because I have diarrhoea. Almost didn't make it in time!"
"And you have been angry since." Abba Ah Beng turned and faced Ah Kow. "And you?" asked Abba Ah Beng. "I was a b-bit..angry but I f-forgive and f-forgot about the innnnncident" stammered Ah Kow, turning red in the face."Ah Lek, Ah Lek, what shall I do with you?" Abba Ah Beng said turning back to face Ah Lek with a shake of his head, "You have let your anger control your heart and your mind. You allowed anger to dwell in your soul.
A small incident gets blown out of proportion. A small push by your senior disciple had taken control of your life, poisoned your soul and gave you an ulcer."After a short pause for dramatic effect, Abba Ah Beng continued, "In life, you may not have control over what other people do to you.
However, you do have the control over how you react to their provocations. You can choose to forgive, forget and move on. Or, you can choose to allow other people control your life. Why should you let others ruin your life?"
endnotes:-
"don't play play" -Singapore slang made famous by Phua Chu Kang, a Singaporean sitcom. Means "taking something seriously"
"cheket"-Malay word for "strangle".
"aiyuh"-Malaysian and Singaporean word for "ouch"
Tags: Junior Disciple, St Paul, Abba, Monastery Chapel
"Whoa," yelped junior disciple Ah Lek in surprise. "Arrgh!" shouted junior disciple Ah Kow as senior disciple Ah Moo pushed his way between them and sent both of them falling off the straight and narrow path that leads to the Sow Lin monastery chapel. Ah Kow fell to the left into a bush of yellow daffodil. "Wow," he thought, "the sky is so blue." "Ouch, ouch" shouted Ah Lek who fell to the right into a rose garden.
"I so hate senior disciple Ah Moo," said Ah Lek as he extricated himself from the thorns. "He makes me so angry" "Leave him be. He just a big bully," said Ah Kow as he dusted his robe clean."I am so furious. One day I will get even. Vengeance is mine said the Lord, and Ah Lek will be My instrument," Ah Lek told Ah Kow. "Hey, don't simply quote the Bible. No play, play, you know," replied Ah Kow in alarm, waiting for a thunderbolt to strike."I am still angry" said Ah Lek to Ah Kow during supper that evening in the refectory.
Paused in the act of placing a piece of meat into his mouth, Ah Kow blinked and said. "You're still angry?" "Yeah, I am so angry that I cannot enjoy my meat." The disciples have just finished their meat-week where they fast from eating meat for two weeks before Lent. "See there. I can't stand it. That bully is enjoying himself," said Ah Lek pointing to the senior disciple table where Ah Moo just cracked a joke and all the other senior disciples are laughing.
"I can't stand being in the same room as him!" "Didn't Our Lord teach us to forgive and forget?" Ah Kow pointed out. "Forgive, yes. Forget, no" declared Ah Lek with firm conviction. "Aah...?" Ah Kow tailed off in confusion. "I am so angry that I didn't sleep a wink last night," declared Ah Lek to Ah Kow as they meet the next morning for prayers. "I was thinking of all the ways I can cheket his scrawny neck." "You're still at it?" asked Ah Kow sleepily.
"What about St.Paul's teaching about not letting the sun goes down on your anger?" "That don't count," said Ah Lek smugly, "Somewhere in the world, the sun is always shining so it can never go down on my anger. Maybe I shall get a big stick and hit Ah Moo on the head. Do you think he will forgive me?" "Donno," said Ah Kow cautiously as he slowly back away.
"Aiyuh , my stomach hurts," yells Ah Lek as he rolled on his bed later that day. "Let me fetch Abba Ah Beng" said Ah Kow as he hurried to his sifu's room. Abba Ah Beng called in the services of Abba Thomas who is a bivocational Abba. His other vocation is as a doctor. "He has a gastric ulcer," said Abba Thomas after he finished his examination, "I wonder what brought this on?" "Must be his anger," whispered Ah Kow.
"What anger?" thundered Abba Ah Beng who has superb hearing, especially for the dinner bell. "Ah Lek has been angry at senior disciple Ah Moo since he pushed us into the bushes yesterday!" Ah Kow said, pointing his skinny finger at Ah Moo. "I did?" Ah Moo sounded surprised. "Yes," Ah Moo said after a moment's pause. "That was in the morning when I was rushing for the toilet because I have diarrhoea. Almost didn't make it in time!"
"And you have been angry since." Abba Ah Beng turned and faced Ah Kow. "And you?" asked Abba Ah Beng. "I was a b-bit..angry but I f-forgive and f-forgot about the innnnncident" stammered Ah Kow, turning red in the face."Ah Lek, Ah Lek, what shall I do with you?" Abba Ah Beng said turning back to face Ah Lek with a shake of his head, "You have let your anger control your heart and your mind. You allowed anger to dwell in your soul.
A small incident gets blown out of proportion. A small push by your senior disciple had taken control of your life, poisoned your soul and gave you an ulcer."After a short pause for dramatic effect, Abba Ah Beng continued, "In life, you may not have control over what other people do to you.
However, you do have the control over how you react to their provocations. You can choose to forgive, forget and move on. Or, you can choose to allow other people control your life. Why should you let others ruin your life?"
endnotes:-
"don't play play" -Singapore slang made famous by Phua Chu Kang, a Singaporean sitcom. Means "taking something seriously"
"cheket"-Malay word for "strangle".
"aiyuh"-Malaysian and Singaporean word for "ouch"
Tags: Junior Disciple, St Paul, Abba, Monastery Chapel
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Power of the Tongue
Words have the power to motivate or destroy, energize or deflate, inspire or create despair. Many successful executives can remember the time their father failed to give affirmation to them as a child. The result was either overachievement to prove their worth, or under achievement to prove he was right.
Many a wife has lost her ability to love because of a critical husband. Many a husband has left a marriage because of words of disrespect and ungratefulness. Stories abound regarding the power of words. There are just as many stories of those who have been encouraged, challenged, and comforted with words that made a difference in their lives.
Jesus knew the power of words. He used parables to convey His principles of the Kingdom of God. He used words of forgiveness and mercy. He used words to challenge. He used words to inspire His disciples to miraculous faith.
Do your words give life? Do they inspire and challenge others to greatness? Who does God want you to encourage through your words today? Affirm someone close to you today.
The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. - Proverbs 18:21
Power of the Tongue by Os Hillman
-------------------------------------
At times I was not careful with my tongue too. Lash out then regret on the consequences...sigh!
Tags: Power of the Tongue, Kingdom of God, Parables, Proverbs
Many a wife has lost her ability to love because of a critical husband. Many a husband has left a marriage because of words of disrespect and ungratefulness. Stories abound regarding the power of words. There are just as many stories of those who have been encouraged, challenged, and comforted with words that made a difference in their lives.
Jesus knew the power of words. He used parables to convey His principles of the Kingdom of God. He used words of forgiveness and mercy. He used words to challenge. He used words to inspire His disciples to miraculous faith.
Do your words give life? Do they inspire and challenge others to greatness? Who does God want you to encourage through your words today? Affirm someone close to you today.
The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. - Proverbs 18:21
Power of the Tongue by Os Hillman
-------------------------------------
At times I was not careful with my tongue too. Lash out then regret on the consequences...sigh!
Tags: Power of the Tongue, Kingdom of God, Parables, Proverbs
Friday, April 11, 2008
Such a Time as This
On the third day Esther put on her royal robes and stood in the inner court of the palace, in front of the king's hall. - Esther 5:1a
Esther was a woman who lived for a cause greater than herself. God used this woman to save the entire Jewish people from extermination. However, before God could use her, she had to come to a place of death in herself. It was not an easy decision. Her uncle Mordecai was the instrument God used to challenge her to measure up to the task.
Do not think that because you are in the king's house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this? (Esther 4:13b-14)
Mordecai was telling it straight. For her to speak up meant great risks if the king did not receive her. It was automatic death if the king did not extend his scepter, which meant acceptance of her approach to the throne. It was also a time to realize that God may have brought her to this place and time for this specific purpose. However, if she did not respond in faith, God would use another instrument to deliver the people. What would she do?
Go, gather together all the Jews who are in Susa, and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my maids will fast as you do. When this is done, I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish (Esther 4:16).
On the third day of the fast she came and stood in the inner court of the palace, in front of the king's hall. She was like Jesus who stood in the inner court of Heaven on that third, resurrection day. She gave up her life, but God raised it up on that day and delivered an entire people from destruction because of one woman's willingness to give up her life for a greater cause.
God has called each of us to a purpose greater than ourselves. Know that it will require death before life can be given to this purpose. It must be His life that lives, not ours.
by Osman Hill
Do you know your life's purpose?
Tags: Esther, Mordecai, God, Jews
Esther was a woman who lived for a cause greater than herself. God used this woman to save the entire Jewish people from extermination. However, before God could use her, she had to come to a place of death in herself. It was not an easy decision. Her uncle Mordecai was the instrument God used to challenge her to measure up to the task.
Do not think that because you are in the king's house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this? (Esther 4:13b-14)
Mordecai was telling it straight. For her to speak up meant great risks if the king did not receive her. It was automatic death if the king did not extend his scepter, which meant acceptance of her approach to the throne. It was also a time to realize that God may have brought her to this place and time for this specific purpose. However, if she did not respond in faith, God would use another instrument to deliver the people. What would she do?
Go, gather together all the Jews who are in Susa, and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my maids will fast as you do. When this is done, I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish (Esther 4:16).
On the third day of the fast she came and stood in the inner court of the palace, in front of the king's hall. She was like Jesus who stood in the inner court of Heaven on that third, resurrection day. She gave up her life, but God raised it up on that day and delivered an entire people from destruction because of one woman's willingness to give up her life for a greater cause.
God has called each of us to a purpose greater than ourselves. Know that it will require death before life can be given to this purpose. It must be His life that lives, not ours.
by Osman Hill
Do you know your life's purpose?
Tags: Esther, Mordecai, God, Jews
Monday, April 07, 2008
Attitude is Everything
John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!"
He was a natural motivator.
If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation. Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked him, "I don't get it!
You can't be a positive person all of the time How do you do it?"
He replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or ... you can choose to be in a bad mood I choose to be in a good mood." Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.
"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested.
"Yes, it is," he said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life."
I reflected on what he said. Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.
Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back. I saw him about six months after the accident.
When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Wanna see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.
"The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter," he replied. "Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or...I could choose to die. I chose to live."
"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked He continued, "..the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man'. I knew I needed to take action."
"What did you do?" I asked.
"Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said John. "She asked if I was allergic to anything 'Yes, I replied.' The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Gravity'"
Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead." He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude... I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.
Attitude, after all, is everything.
Tags: Attitude is Everything, Attitude, Inspiration, Motivator
He was a natural motivator.
If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation. Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked him, "I don't get it!
You can't be a positive person all of the time How do you do it?"
He replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or ... you can choose to be in a bad mood I choose to be in a good mood." Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.
"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested.
"Yes, it is," he said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life."
I reflected on what he said. Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.
Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back. I saw him about six months after the accident.
When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Wanna see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.
"The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter," he replied. "Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or...I could choose to die. I chose to live."
"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked He continued, "..the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man'. I knew I needed to take action."
"What did you do?" I asked.
"Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said John. "She asked if I was allergic to anything 'Yes, I replied.' The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Gravity'"
Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead." He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude... I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.
Attitude, after all, is everything.
Tags: Attitude is Everything, Attitude, Inspiration, Motivator
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
The Ah Kau Story
Ah Kau is a guy who sells newspaper every morning next to your apartment, and you are one of his daily regular customers. Before dashing off to your office every day, you will go to his small stall and buy The Star newspaper. Wearing a newly pressed shirt, a tie, and a pair of Clarks shoes, you grab a copy of The Star, pay RM1.20 and exchange smiles with Ah Kau and greet him.
"Apa macam Ah Kau ini hari? Bisnes ada baik?" (How are you today? Is your business good?)
The normal greeting like you do every day. Yes, Ah Kau doesn't speak English. He speaks Chinese and knows a little bit of Malay. He speaks a little bit of Malay but with a very thick Chinese accent.
"Biasa saja! ini bisnes aa, kadang kadang baik, kadang kadang tada untung." (Normal only! This business, sometimes good, sometimes no profit)
"Biasalah hidup. Kadang kadang ok, kadang kadang tak ok." (Normal life lah. Sometimes ok, sometimes not ok)
You give Ah Kau a pat on the back. You smile and walk away and get into your car. You start the engine and start driving to your office, a multinational semiconductor company located in a premier industrial area. You are a young and promising finance executive and the future looks bright for you.
A year goes by and things look pretty good on the track. You decide to marry your fiance and have your new wife moves in to your place. Both of you feel happy because you can save more money as the two of you will be sharing one apartment and can live as one.
Ah Kau is still selling the newspaper as usual. Sometimes in the morning your wife gets the newspaper from Ah Kau instead of you. A year later a child comes along, and you decide to buy and move into a newly developed condominium just across the street. This place is bigger so it will be perfectly fit for the 3 of you. But since both of you are working, you decide to get a maid to take of the household and your kid.
By this time you're offered a managerial job from another multinational; the remuneration package offered is much better in terms of the pay, contractual bonus, medical benefits, ESOS scheme and a few others which make it impossible for you to decline. So you join this company happily.
You get busier. You realize that you spend less and less time with your family. When your department is busy preparing for the next audit, your working hours become more and more ridiculous. Any internal issues arising in the office means you'll be stuck in the office until 8 or 9 pm. Sometimes, during the weekend, you'll spend your time in your office, buried under paper works and documentation's, instead of taking your family for a walk in the park.
One morning, on your way to get your copy of The Star, you realized that Ah Kau is no longer in his stall. So is his rundown motorbike. Instead, there's another young Chinese guy at the stall.
"What happen to Ah Kau?" You ask out of curiosity. "Oh, he is still around, but he is no longer taking care of this stall as he has opened up a new grocery shop down town. I am running this newspaper stall for him." "Ok." you smile. You feel happy for Ah Kau. At last he manages to improve his life.
Your normal life continues. A year passes by and at the end of your company's fiscal year, you're rewarded for your effort with a 5 months bonus pay-out by your employer. Wow. Now that is a very handsome reward. You feel your effort has been equally compensated. To celebrate, you decide that it's time to trade your 5-year old Proton Wira to the latest Honda Civic model. It won't be much a problem to you to get a loan scheme from the bank as your pay slip will provide you an easy gateway to access financial help from any bank.
One day, the hardest reality of life hits you right on the face. The company that you've been working for years announces that they're moving their business to China for cost and competitive reason and has asked you to find a job somewhere else.
"What?" You scream out cold. "I got a lot of liabilities on the card! Who's gonna pay for my mortgage? My car? My credit card? My gym fees? My bills?" You yell like there's no way out.
This is the first time you feel let down by your own employer. All your hard work seem to go up on the smoke. You feel sick. You now hate your company. On the way home, you stopped by at a mamak restaurant for a cup of teh tarik while pondering about your future. Alone.
Suddenly you saw this new, shiny BMW 3 series being parked nearby. And to your surprise, it was Ah Kau. Yes, Ah Kau who used to sell newspapers nearby your old apartment. "What happened to old Ah Kau?" You whisper to yourself.
Ah Kau still recognizes you, and sit next to you, and shared his story. To make it short, Ah Kau had accumulated his money from selling newspapers to open more stalls, one after another. Every new stall is run by his workers so that he focused on opening more and more stalls, which in turn give him more and more money.
Over the years, he had accumulated enough cash to open up new grocery store while at the same time buying more assets to grow his wealth. And his current wealth and success is achieved without any loan or financial help from banks and other financial institutions.
There you go. That's the story. While Ah Kau is set to become financially free, you're back to where you're started before. Ground zero. Before leaving, Ah Kau gives you a familiar quote, "Biasalah hidup. Kadang kadang ok, kadang kadang tak ok."
He gives you a pat on the back and walks away.
In reality, if you're observant enough, there are a lot of Ah Kaus out there, that you will see every day and every where you go. The names are different, but inside them is every character of Ah Kau. They might be Uncle Dorai, Ah Chong, Pak Leman, Makcik Gemuk, Pak Man nasi lemak or others.
They look to be struggling on the surface, but if you look carefully and compare with you life, many of them are living with little or no liabilities. They ride an old kapcai bike. They live in an old rundown house. They don't have credit card to swipe. They wear a 10-year old shirt and short. No new, shiny Toyota Harrier. In short, their living means are far below than yours.
But what you don't realize is that many of them can save more money than yours, and over the years generate enough money to expand their business, or invest in properties. Their asset columns are much thicker than that of yours.
So the next time you see Ah Kaus, never look down on them, and never under estimate them. Or else you're up for a harsh reality lesson.
After reading the above, is your life a happening life and just a normal life hoping for the best to come.
Tags: Inspiration, Ah Kau
"Apa macam Ah Kau ini hari? Bisnes ada baik?" (How are you today? Is your business good?)
The normal greeting like you do every day. Yes, Ah Kau doesn't speak English. He speaks Chinese and knows a little bit of Malay. He speaks a little bit of Malay but with a very thick Chinese accent.
"Biasa saja! ini bisnes aa, kadang kadang baik, kadang kadang tada untung." (Normal only! This business, sometimes good, sometimes no profit)
"Biasalah hidup. Kadang kadang ok, kadang kadang tak ok." (Normal life lah. Sometimes ok, sometimes not ok)
You give Ah Kau a pat on the back. You smile and walk away and get into your car. You start the engine and start driving to your office, a multinational semiconductor company located in a premier industrial area. You are a young and promising finance executive and the future looks bright for you.
A year goes by and things look pretty good on the track. You decide to marry your fiance and have your new wife moves in to your place. Both of you feel happy because you can save more money as the two of you will be sharing one apartment and can live as one.
Ah Kau is still selling the newspaper as usual. Sometimes in the morning your wife gets the newspaper from Ah Kau instead of you. A year later a child comes along, and you decide to buy and move into a newly developed condominium just across the street. This place is bigger so it will be perfectly fit for the 3 of you. But since both of you are working, you decide to get a maid to take of the household and your kid.
By this time you're offered a managerial job from another multinational; the remuneration package offered is much better in terms of the pay, contractual bonus, medical benefits, ESOS scheme and a few others which make it impossible for you to decline. So you join this company happily.
You get busier. You realize that you spend less and less time with your family. When your department is busy preparing for the next audit, your working hours become more and more ridiculous. Any internal issues arising in the office means you'll be stuck in the office until 8 or 9 pm. Sometimes, during the weekend, you'll spend your time in your office, buried under paper works and documentation's, instead of taking your family for a walk in the park.
One morning, on your way to get your copy of The Star, you realized that Ah Kau is no longer in his stall. So is his rundown motorbike. Instead, there's another young Chinese guy at the stall.
"What happen to Ah Kau?" You ask out of curiosity. "Oh, he is still around, but he is no longer taking care of this stall as he has opened up a new grocery shop down town. I am running this newspaper stall for him." "Ok." you smile. You feel happy for Ah Kau. At last he manages to improve his life.
Your normal life continues. A year passes by and at the end of your company's fiscal year, you're rewarded for your effort with a 5 months bonus pay-out by your employer. Wow. Now that is a very handsome reward. You feel your effort has been equally compensated. To celebrate, you decide that it's time to trade your 5-year old Proton Wira to the latest Honda Civic model. It won't be much a problem to you to get a loan scheme from the bank as your pay slip will provide you an easy gateway to access financial help from any bank.
One day, the hardest reality of life hits you right on the face. The company that you've been working for years announces that they're moving their business to China for cost and competitive reason and has asked you to find a job somewhere else.
"What?" You scream out cold. "I got a lot of liabilities on the card! Who's gonna pay for my mortgage? My car? My credit card? My gym fees? My bills?" You yell like there's no way out.
This is the first time you feel let down by your own employer. All your hard work seem to go up on the smoke. You feel sick. You now hate your company. On the way home, you stopped by at a mamak restaurant for a cup of teh tarik while pondering about your future. Alone.
Suddenly you saw this new, shiny BMW 3 series being parked nearby. And to your surprise, it was Ah Kau. Yes, Ah Kau who used to sell newspapers nearby your old apartment. "What happened to old Ah Kau?" You whisper to yourself.
Ah Kau still recognizes you, and sit next to you, and shared his story. To make it short, Ah Kau had accumulated his money from selling newspapers to open more stalls, one after another. Every new stall is run by his workers so that he focused on opening more and more stalls, which in turn give him more and more money.
Over the years, he had accumulated enough cash to open up new grocery store while at the same time buying more assets to grow his wealth. And his current wealth and success is achieved without any loan or financial help from banks and other financial institutions.
There you go. That's the story. While Ah Kau is set to become financially free, you're back to where you're started before. Ground zero. Before leaving, Ah Kau gives you a familiar quote, "Biasalah hidup. Kadang kadang ok, kadang kadang tak ok."
He gives you a pat on the back and walks away.
In reality, if you're observant enough, there are a lot of Ah Kaus out there, that you will see every day and every where you go. The names are different, but inside them is every character of Ah Kau. They might be Uncle Dorai, Ah Chong, Pak Leman, Makcik Gemuk, Pak Man nasi lemak or others.
They look to be struggling on the surface, but if you look carefully and compare with you life, many of them are living with little or no liabilities. They ride an old kapcai bike. They live in an old rundown house. They don't have credit card to swipe. They wear a 10-year old shirt and short. No new, shiny Toyota Harrier. In short, their living means are far below than yours.
But what you don't realize is that many of them can save more money than yours, and over the years generate enough money to expand their business, or invest in properties. Their asset columns are much thicker than that of yours.
So the next time you see Ah Kaus, never look down on them, and never under estimate them. Or else you're up for a harsh reality lesson.
After reading the above, is your life a happening life and just a normal life hoping for the best to come.
Tags: Inspiration, Ah Kau
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Teambuilding Session
Went for my office teambuilding session held at Hotel Nikko this afternoon and found it interesting. As usual, colleagues in the same department tend to sit together but the organiser split us and requested us to move to another table that we won't know most of the people. He did notice those who continued to stick together even after moving tables.....haha.
It started with some simple introduction by different companies/departments. Then moved on to some questionnaire session and then followed by some games. Few were on IQ questions, really tested our brains. Can't guess the answers at all.......hehe
Another teambuilding game was to build a free standing tower (however you want to call it). My table was given only 125 A4 size papers, 100 staple bullets with a stapler and 6 inches of cellophane tape. Given 40 minutes to build/construct a paper tower. My team has 2 engineers and we waited for them to do some calculations with the materials that we have......see how serious these engineers were.
We started rolling the papers, stapled it on one side, put 6 rolled papers at the bottom to begin with. Just when it reach about 6 feet, it dropped all the way down. We still have 15 minutes and rebuilt it with a bigger base this time. What was the outcome?
This was my team's tower but we didn't win. Lost to another team's so-called Kuala Lumpur Eiffel Tower (yeah, the shape of the eiffel tower). After the tower building, it was hi-tea time, my favourite. Good selection of food and after consuming, I think it was a bit too much as I was going to have dinner to celebrate my sister's birthday at night......oops!
Never mind, left around 7.45pm and dropped by at a restaurant and ate a simple Singaporean Fried Mee Hoon just to fill my stomach, in case it goes hungry during midnight time, like right now.
Tags: Teambuilding, Hotel Nikko, Free Standing Tower, Singapore Fried Mee Hoon
It started with some simple introduction by different companies/departments. Then moved on to some questionnaire session and then followed by some games. Few were on IQ questions, really tested our brains. Can't guess the answers at all.......hehe
Another teambuilding game was to build a free standing tower (however you want to call it). My table was given only 125 A4 size papers, 100 staple bullets with a stapler and 6 inches of cellophane tape. Given 40 minutes to build/construct a paper tower. My team has 2 engineers and we waited for them to do some calculations with the materials that we have......see how serious these engineers were.
We started rolling the papers, stapled it on one side, put 6 rolled papers at the bottom to begin with. Just when it reach about 6 feet, it dropped all the way down. We still have 15 minutes and rebuilt it with a bigger base this time. What was the outcome?
This was my team's tower but we didn't win. Lost to another team's so-called Kuala Lumpur Eiffel Tower (yeah, the shape of the eiffel tower). After the tower building, it was hi-tea time, my favourite. Good selection of food and after consuming, I think it was a bit too much as I was going to have dinner to celebrate my sister's birthday at night......oops!
Never mind, left around 7.45pm and dropped by at a restaurant and ate a simple Singaporean Fried Mee Hoon just to fill my stomach, in case it goes hungry during midnight time, like right now.
Tags: Teambuilding, Hotel Nikko, Free Standing Tower, Singapore Fried Mee Hoon
Friday, December 28, 2007
Story of an Eagle
A very meaningful way to learn of life - only parts of it.-The eagle has the longest life-span of its' species.
-It can live up to 70 years
-But to reach this age, the eagle must make a hard decision
-In its' 40's, its' long and flexible talons can no longer grab prey which serves as food
-Its' long and sharp beak becomes bent
-Its' old-aged and heavy wings, due to their thick feathers, become stuck to its' chest and make it difficult to fly
-Then, the eagle is left with only two options: die or go through a painful process of change which lasts 150 days.
-The process requires that the eagle fly to a mountain top and sit on its' nest
-There the eagle knocks its' beak against a rock until it plucks it out
-After plucking it out, the eagle will wait for a new beak to grow back and then it will pluck out its' talons
-When its' new talons grow back, the eagle starts plucking its' old-aged feathers
-And after five months, the eagle takes its' famous flight of rebirth and lives for ... 30 more years.
Tags: Inspiration, Eagle
Monday, November 26, 2007
Follow Mom's Advise
If you’re striking out in the game of love, it may be time to call in the ultimate dating coach: Mom. The dynamic combo of a) her keeping your best interests in mind and b) her relying on a lifetime of experience make Mom the ultimate authority on what you need to look for in a man. Need a preview of what you can expect her to tell you? Below, find some of the best bits of mom-wisdom:-
Mama says: Look for a guy who's generous
While many guys need to carefully monitor their spending habits, one who never splurges on his sweetheart may not be who Mom would consider Mr. Right-For-You. “My mother always told me that cheap’ is a first cousin of selfish’, so I should steer clear of guys who are always wanting to split the tab or unnecessarily counting every penny, says Rayna, 27, a flight attendant in Dallas, TX. “She said that guys who were cheap were just another version of selfish: mostly thinking of themselves more than thinking of others.
Emily, 24, a retail salesperson in New York, NY, said her mom had similar views and warned her against a particularly frugal man she once dated. “I once lived with a guy for a year who was a well-paid stockbroker. Even though he made nearly 10 times my salary, he always insisted on splitting all of our living costs—even including food and the expenses whenever we took a vacation together. My mom hated that he was so cheap because she thought it showed a lack of selflessness, and she warned me that marrying him would be a terrible mistake because he’d always think of himself before me or even our future kids. I ignored her, but when he got us tickets to go see a Broadway show on my birthday — one he wanted to see — and asked me to pay for my ticket, I got an inkling that Mom was right. Later his true selfishness became very apparent. I never would have wanted a lifetime of that, so I broke up with him. Should have listened to Mom from the get-go!"
Lesson learned: A guy who’s willing to make a sacrifice to treat you like a queen thinks (rightfully so!) that you deserve to feel like one.
Mama says: Look for a guy who is well-mannered
After raising perfectly polished kids of her own, Mom knows that training a grown man who is rough around the edges is a challenge that you don’t want to be saddled with. "My mother always tells me to pay close attention to a guy's manners — how he eats, if he interacts appropriately with the waitstaff, if he follows the basic principles of etiquette — when I am out on a first date with him," says Molly, 30, a radio producer in Boston, MA. “She says that if he’s off’ in any of those areas, I might want to reconsider having a future with him because she claims it’s tough enough teaching manners to children; imagine trying to teach them to an adult!’
Fran, 27, a day-care assistant in Atlanta, GA, says that her mother never approved of her ill-mannered ex, and now she understands why: "When my mom first met my ex we were out to dinner and he talked with his mouth full the entire evening, didn’t know which silverware to use, and when dinner was over, he never thanked them for it. She assured me his behavior was indicative of future situations that would embarrass me in other social situations. I thought she was totally overreacting and being way too judgmental, but I later discovered that she was right. Any time we were out with friends his manners would always mortify me. Eventually I found myself making excuses for why we couldn’t meet friends out. I finally stopped canceling plans with friends and ended things with him. Mom was right—a poorly-mannered guy who isn’t making an effort to improve in that area makes for a bad boyfriend!”
Lesson learned: A guy who knows the appropriate ways to act in social situations (or is eager to train up) will never embarrass you.
Mama says: Look for a guy who’s industrious
Have you ever met a mom who wishes that her daughter would date a lazy guy? Didn’t think so. When it comes to recommending you seek out a hardworking guy, Mom knows what you might not always understand: A guy with a good work ethic will always take care of her little girl. "My mom told me that I should only date guys who are hardworking at their jobs, because that would be a good indicator of whether he would as a husband be a good provider for me and our kids, says Paula, 25, a nursing student in Washington, D.C. While Linda, 33, a catering services representative in Villanova, PA, said her mother also recommended looking for a man with a strong work ethic, her mother’s advice involved looking beyond the workplace: "My mother told me to look for a guy who not only worked hard on the job, but also at home. She always told me to make sure he was willing to do his share of taking out the trash and helping out with the cooking and cleaning, too. She probably advised this because she raised five kids and kept up the house without the help of a husband who was willing to do those things, and it wore her down! Pretty solid advice, I think.
For many mothers, industriousness and maturity go hand in hand (and you know Mom always warns you against those Peter Pan types): “My mother hated this one guy I dated who was habitually — and happily — unemployed, says Becky, 28, a computer programmer in Vienna, VA. “He’d veg out on the couch all day, playing video games and order pizza while I worked to support us both. Mom would always ask me, Do you really think this will change once you get married? Why have kids? You’ve already got one!’ and she’d urge me to find a guy with some semblance of a work ethic. Eventually I took her words to heart and started making sure that any guy I dated was not only gainfully employed, but had career goals for his future. Mom was right—an industrious guy is a mature guy."
Lesson learned: A guy with a good work ethic, who always does his best to make your life together comfortable, is a solid partner.
Mama says: Look for a guy who's flexible
Mom knows that life is full of ups and downs, which is why she always wants you to meet a guy who can help you make lemonade should life hand you lemons. “My mom’s number one piece of advice for me when I was dating was to find a guy who was adaptable, because she said life requires that we all be able to roll with the unexpected, says Megan, 34, a web administrator in Moreno Valley, CA. Stacey, 28, a public-relations coordinator in Ft. Myers, FL, says that she realized how valuable her mom’s similar advice was when she was faced with a career opportunity: “I once dated a guy who was very set in his ways and pretty unwilling to deviate from his ideas of the way things should be. My mom would always say, How are you going to live the rest of your life with someone who can’t handle all of the things that life throws at you?’ When I got my dream job that involved moving to another town, he refused to budge. I took her advice and went without him, and it was the best decision I ever made. I can’t even begin to imagine what my life would be like if I had stayed like he wanted to. Mom was right—sometimes in life you need to be willing to reconsider your rules.
Lesson learned: Life’s full of both rain and shine—having a partner who can weather both with you is a keeper.
Mama says: Look for a guy who loves children
If you dream of a future filled with kids, Mama will always be the first one to tell you that you’d best look for a man who wants the same thing. Dana, 32, a teacher in New York, NY, says she always knew she wanted four children, and her mother always advised that she look for a guy who was on the same page: “My mom always told me to not only never considering dating a guy who didn’t want to have kids, but to also make sure that the one I picked really loved being around children. She always said that I should never want to be with the kind of guy who I’d have to convince or beg to have kids because he’d probably make a not-so-hot father anyway. Even if you’re not sure you’re ready for a brood of babies, chances are Mom will still tell you that picking a guy who enjoys being around children is a good idea. “My mom says that men who are good with kids are always good-hearted men because they are giving people,’ says Ashleigh, 23, a store manager in Akron, OH. “She always tells me that men who like kids are the sweetest kind, and in my dating experience, I’ve found that she’s totally right.
Lesson learned: Whether you want kids or not, in general, men who like kids are kind-natured souls.
(Love: Follow Mom's Advise by Chelsea Kaplan)
Tags: Mom's Advise, Frugal, Selfish, Well-Mannered, Industrious, Flexible, Children
Mama says: Look for a guy who's generous
While many guys need to carefully monitor their spending habits, one who never splurges on his sweetheart may not be who Mom would consider Mr. Right-For-You. “My mother always told me that cheap’ is a first cousin of selfish’, so I should steer clear of guys who are always wanting to split the tab or unnecessarily counting every penny, says Rayna, 27, a flight attendant in Dallas, TX. “She said that guys who were cheap were just another version of selfish: mostly thinking of themselves more than thinking of others.
Emily, 24, a retail salesperson in New York, NY, said her mom had similar views and warned her against a particularly frugal man she once dated. “I once lived with a guy for a year who was a well-paid stockbroker. Even though he made nearly 10 times my salary, he always insisted on splitting all of our living costs—even including food and the expenses whenever we took a vacation together. My mom hated that he was so cheap because she thought it showed a lack of selflessness, and she warned me that marrying him would be a terrible mistake because he’d always think of himself before me or even our future kids. I ignored her, but when he got us tickets to go see a Broadway show on my birthday — one he wanted to see — and asked me to pay for my ticket, I got an inkling that Mom was right. Later his true selfishness became very apparent. I never would have wanted a lifetime of that, so I broke up with him. Should have listened to Mom from the get-go!"
Lesson learned: A guy who’s willing to make a sacrifice to treat you like a queen thinks (rightfully so!) that you deserve to feel like one.
Mama says: Look for a guy who is well-mannered
After raising perfectly polished kids of her own, Mom knows that training a grown man who is rough around the edges is a challenge that you don’t want to be saddled with. "My mother always tells me to pay close attention to a guy's manners — how he eats, if he interacts appropriately with the waitstaff, if he follows the basic principles of etiquette — when I am out on a first date with him," says Molly, 30, a radio producer in Boston, MA. “She says that if he’s off’ in any of those areas, I might want to reconsider having a future with him because she claims it’s tough enough teaching manners to children; imagine trying to teach them to an adult!’
Fran, 27, a day-care assistant in Atlanta, GA, says that her mother never approved of her ill-mannered ex, and now she understands why: "When my mom first met my ex we were out to dinner and he talked with his mouth full the entire evening, didn’t know which silverware to use, and when dinner was over, he never thanked them for it. She assured me his behavior was indicative of future situations that would embarrass me in other social situations. I thought she was totally overreacting and being way too judgmental, but I later discovered that she was right. Any time we were out with friends his manners would always mortify me. Eventually I found myself making excuses for why we couldn’t meet friends out. I finally stopped canceling plans with friends and ended things with him. Mom was right—a poorly-mannered guy who isn’t making an effort to improve in that area makes for a bad boyfriend!”
Lesson learned: A guy who knows the appropriate ways to act in social situations (or is eager to train up) will never embarrass you.
Mama says: Look for a guy who’s industrious
Have you ever met a mom who wishes that her daughter would date a lazy guy? Didn’t think so. When it comes to recommending you seek out a hardworking guy, Mom knows what you might not always understand: A guy with a good work ethic will always take care of her little girl. "My mom told me that I should only date guys who are hardworking at their jobs, because that would be a good indicator of whether he would as a husband be a good provider for me and our kids, says Paula, 25, a nursing student in Washington, D.C. While Linda, 33, a catering services representative in Villanova, PA, said her mother also recommended looking for a man with a strong work ethic, her mother’s advice involved looking beyond the workplace: "My mother told me to look for a guy who not only worked hard on the job, but also at home. She always told me to make sure he was willing to do his share of taking out the trash and helping out with the cooking and cleaning, too. She probably advised this because she raised five kids and kept up the house without the help of a husband who was willing to do those things, and it wore her down! Pretty solid advice, I think.
For many mothers, industriousness and maturity go hand in hand (and you know Mom always warns you against those Peter Pan types): “My mother hated this one guy I dated who was habitually — and happily — unemployed, says Becky, 28, a computer programmer in Vienna, VA. “He’d veg out on the couch all day, playing video games and order pizza while I worked to support us both. Mom would always ask me, Do you really think this will change once you get married? Why have kids? You’ve already got one!’ and she’d urge me to find a guy with some semblance of a work ethic. Eventually I took her words to heart and started making sure that any guy I dated was not only gainfully employed, but had career goals for his future. Mom was right—an industrious guy is a mature guy."
Lesson learned: A guy with a good work ethic, who always does his best to make your life together comfortable, is a solid partner.
Mama says: Look for a guy who's flexible
Mom knows that life is full of ups and downs, which is why she always wants you to meet a guy who can help you make lemonade should life hand you lemons. “My mom’s number one piece of advice for me when I was dating was to find a guy who was adaptable, because she said life requires that we all be able to roll with the unexpected, says Megan, 34, a web administrator in Moreno Valley, CA. Stacey, 28, a public-relations coordinator in Ft. Myers, FL, says that she realized how valuable her mom’s similar advice was when she was faced with a career opportunity: “I once dated a guy who was very set in his ways and pretty unwilling to deviate from his ideas of the way things should be. My mom would always say, How are you going to live the rest of your life with someone who can’t handle all of the things that life throws at you?’ When I got my dream job that involved moving to another town, he refused to budge. I took her advice and went without him, and it was the best decision I ever made. I can’t even begin to imagine what my life would be like if I had stayed like he wanted to. Mom was right—sometimes in life you need to be willing to reconsider your rules.
Lesson learned: Life’s full of both rain and shine—having a partner who can weather both with you is a keeper.
Mama says: Look for a guy who loves children
If you dream of a future filled with kids, Mama will always be the first one to tell you that you’d best look for a man who wants the same thing. Dana, 32, a teacher in New York, NY, says she always knew she wanted four children, and her mother always advised that she look for a guy who was on the same page: “My mom always told me to not only never considering dating a guy who didn’t want to have kids, but to also make sure that the one I picked really loved being around children. She always said that I should never want to be with the kind of guy who I’d have to convince or beg to have kids because he’d probably make a not-so-hot father anyway. Even if you’re not sure you’re ready for a brood of babies, chances are Mom will still tell you that picking a guy who enjoys being around children is a good idea. “My mom says that men who are good with kids are always good-hearted men because they are giving people,’ says Ashleigh, 23, a store manager in Akron, OH. “She always tells me that men who like kids are the sweetest kind, and in my dating experience, I’ve found that she’s totally right.
Lesson learned: Whether you want kids or not, in general, men who like kids are kind-natured souls.
(Love: Follow Mom's Advise by Chelsea Kaplan)
Tags: Mom's Advise, Frugal, Selfish, Well-Mannered, Industrious, Flexible, Children
Monday, August 13, 2007
The Coffee Story
"The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems, but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect"
* A group of graduates, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor.
* Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.
* Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups -porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite- telling them to help themselves to the coffee.
* When all the students had a cup of coffee, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the simple and cheap ones.
* While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.
* Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee.
* In most cases, it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink.
* What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups... Then you began eyeing each other's cups.
* Now consider this:
- Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups.
- They are just tools to hold and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of Life we live.
- Sometimes, by concentrating on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee God has provided us. Enjoy your coffee!."
* The happiest people don't have the best of everything.
* They just make the best of everything."
1. Live simply.
2. Love generously.
3. Care deeply.
4. Speak kindly.
5. Leave the rest to God. You are the miracle, my friend; Your life either shines a light OR casts a shadow!
Shine a light & Enjoy the Coffee !!!
Tags: Coffee, Happiest People, God
* A group of graduates, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor.
* Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.
* Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups -porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite- telling them to help themselves to the coffee.
* When all the students had a cup of coffee, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the simple and cheap ones.
* While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.
* Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee.
* In most cases, it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink.
* What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups... Then you began eyeing each other's cups.
* Now consider this:
- Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups.
- They are just tools to hold and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of Life we live.
- Sometimes, by concentrating on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee God has provided us. Enjoy your coffee!."
* The happiest people don't have the best of everything.
* They just make the best of everything."
1. Live simply.
2. Love generously.
3. Care deeply.
4. Speak kindly.
5. Leave the rest to God. You are the miracle, my friend; Your life either shines a light OR casts a shadow!
Shine a light & Enjoy the Coffee !!!
Tags: Coffee, Happiest People, God
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Ditch Those Old Wineskins!
New wine must be put into new wineskins. (Matthew 9:17)
In Bible times animal skins were cured and made into wine containers. At first they were flexible and easy to work with, but over time they grew rigid and lost their ability to expand. That's why Jesus said, "No one pours new wine into old wineskins. [It] would .. burst the old skins ... [and] the wine would be lost ... New wine must be put into new wineskins." Likewise, God can't put fresh ideas into rigid or 'dead' minds, or change your situation till you're ready to change your thinking. God's Word says: "Don't keep going over old history ... I'm about to do something brand-new." (Isaiah 43:18-19). So if you're asking Him to enlarge your vision, you must first need to make room in your mind for it. Isaiah said, "Clear lots of ground .. Make your tents large. Spread out! Think big" (Isaiah 54:2).
Remember, dreams always come a size too big so you can grow into them, so don't settle for mediocrity in your work, your relationships and your walk with God. Mark Twain said, "Twenty years from now you'll be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the wind. Explore. Dream. Discover." Maybe you come from a background of addiction, poverty, depression, abuse and low self-esteem. Well, God can enable you to rise up and put an end to that old mindset of defeat. He's ready to fill you with "new wine," but first you need to ditch those old wineskins!
Tags: Dreams, Explore, Discover, Inspiration, Wineskin
In Bible times animal skins were cured and made into wine containers. At first they were flexible and easy to work with, but over time they grew rigid and lost their ability to expand. That's why Jesus said, "No one pours new wine into old wineskins. [It] would .. burst the old skins ... [and] the wine would be lost ... New wine must be put into new wineskins." Likewise, God can't put fresh ideas into rigid or 'dead' minds, or change your situation till you're ready to change your thinking. God's Word says: "Don't keep going over old history ... I'm about to do something brand-new." (Isaiah 43:18-19). So if you're asking Him to enlarge your vision, you must first need to make room in your mind for it. Isaiah said, "Clear lots of ground .. Make your tents large. Spread out! Think big" (Isaiah 54:2).
Remember, dreams always come a size too big so you can grow into them, so don't settle for mediocrity in your work, your relationships and your walk with God. Mark Twain said, "Twenty years from now you'll be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the wind. Explore. Dream. Discover." Maybe you come from a background of addiction, poverty, depression, abuse and low self-esteem. Well, God can enable you to rise up and put an end to that old mindset of defeat. He's ready to fill you with "new wine," but first you need to ditch those old wineskins!
Tags: Dreams, Explore, Discover, Inspiration, Wineskin
Monday, July 16, 2007
Come Apart and Rest A While
According to tradition, the apostle John had a hobby raising pigeons. On one occasion a fellow church leader who was returning from a hunting trip stopped by John's place and found him playing with one of his birds and gently corrected him for wasting his time.
John, noticing his friend's hunting bow, said that the string was loose whereupon the man replied, "Yes, I always loosen the string of my bow when it's not in use. If it stayed tight, it would lose its resilience and fail me in the hunt."
"And I am now relaxing the bow of my mind," said John, "so that I may be better able to shoot the arrows of divine truth."
Work is important. We need to eat and we need to take care of our family, but over-busyness can be a curse. Without sufficient rest and relaxation we will eventually lose our health and not be able to work efficiently. And without taking time to nurture and be nurtured in loving relationships, life becomes empty and meaningless.
We need to follow the advice of Jesus when he said to his disciples, "Come apart and rest a while." Or as somebody else put it, "Come apart and rest a while before you come apart."
~ Author Unknown ~
Tags: Inspiration, Thoughts, Christianity
John, noticing his friend's hunting bow, said that the string was loose whereupon the man replied, "Yes, I always loosen the string of my bow when it's not in use. If it stayed tight, it would lose its resilience and fail me in the hunt."
"And I am now relaxing the bow of my mind," said John, "so that I may be better able to shoot the arrows of divine truth."
Work is important. We need to eat and we need to take care of our family, but over-busyness can be a curse. Without sufficient rest and relaxation we will eventually lose our health and not be able to work efficiently. And without taking time to nurture and be nurtured in loving relationships, life becomes empty and meaningless.
We need to follow the advice of Jesus when he said to his disciples, "Come apart and rest a while." Or as somebody else put it, "Come apart and rest a while before you come apart."
~ Author Unknown ~
Tags: Inspiration, Thoughts, Christianity
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Relationships
TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.
A female telephone operator received a phone call one day. She answered,"Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB." There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is."
Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".
NO POINTING FINGERSA man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife forher shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves. If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too.
CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous , sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest."
The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television." There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship.
Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins.
Tags: Inspiration, Relationship, Trust, Pointing Finger, Shortcoming, Weakness, Companion
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