Golfer's Paradise

While walking down the street one day a Malaysian politician is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and he is met by an angel at the entrance.

"Welcome to heaven," says the angel. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the man.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, I have made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the Yang Berhormat

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules," says the angel.

And with that, the angel escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and dressed in the finest batik there is. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then indulge themselves on lobsters, caviar and the most expensive food there is. Present together is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes.

They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where the angel is waiting for him.

"Now it's time to visit heaven."

So, 24 hours pass with the Yang Berhormat joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and the angel returns.

"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."

The Yang Berhormat reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I am better off in hell."

So the angel escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above. The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.

"I don't understand," stammers the Yang Berhormat. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"

The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning, just like you did during an election...... Today you voted."

Vote wisely because our vote will establish our government.

People should not be fearful of the government, government should be fearful of its people.

The government represents its people, if the government is corrupted so are its people.
Tags: Malaysian Politician, Yang Berhormat, Angel, Heaven, Hell, Government, Green Golf Course

Tycoons Serving As 'Air Stewardess'

At the rate of what's going on in Formula 1, I don't think we'll be able to see either Datuk Tony Fernandes or Sir Richard Branson serving as a "stewardess" in an airplane.

At the start of the Formula 1, two tycoons each being the owner of a low cost carrier and also a Formula 1 team respectively, had a friendly bet that whichever racing team is placed below another, the losing team's chief shall serve as a "stewardess" in the winner's airplane.

Datuk Tony Fernandes is the CEO of AirAsia (having won the world's best low cost airline, one up on Richard Branson already) and the principal of the Lotus-Cosworth Formula 1 racing team.

Sir Richard Branson owns both the Virgin Atlantic Airways and the Virgin-Cosworth Formula 1 racing team.

Both of them has a blog on their own too written under the blog names of Tony Fernandes CEO Blog and Richard's Blog respectively.

This picture was extracted from Sun newspaper where it shows Richard Branson's face in a 'stewardess' body serving in an AirAsia's airplane.

Still searching for a picture showing Tony Fernandes in Virgin Atlantic Airways's costume hehe.

At this point of time, both Lotus-Cosworth and Virgin-Cosworth haven't obtained a single point in this year's Formula 1. Will both end up not securing a single point at the end of the season?

But I don't think the words "Coffee, Tea Or Me?" works for them .....


One thing that baffles me a lot is why Lotus-Cosworth racing team didn't obtain their engines from Lotus itself.

I understand about Virgin going for Cosworth's engines as they don't come from the motor industry. But Lotus????????? A car manufacturer that can't even supply its engines for a Formula 1 racing team that is racing under Lotus's name?????? That's really funny.

Being as rich as them, it's fun at times when they get to invest their hard earned monies in areas of their interests/hobbies.

Just like the rich and famous who are buying up the English Premier League teams in England. The Sheikh owner of Manchester City is just throwing his tons of monies into the game as if he was playing the Fantasy Football Manager game.
Tags: Tony Fernandes, Richard Branson, Formula 1, AirAsia, Virgin Atlantic Airways, Lotus-Cosworth, Virgin-Cosworth, Lotus, Cosworth, English Premier League, Fantasy Football Manager

Man Utd To Be Banned in Malaysia?

At the look of it, it won't be long that Manchester United will be banned in Malaysia if the muslim cleric in the state of Johore has his ways.

An adviser to a state of Johore's religious council stated that there are certain football jerseys that muslims shouldn't wear. Reason given (as extracted from Star) - it is as if Muslims are worshipping and exalting the symbols of other religions. Islam does not compromise on this matter, regardless of whether it is worn for fun, fashion or sport especially when it displays images of crosses, liquor brands and devils.

Try googling for this sentence "Muslims warned against wearing 'devilish' Man Utd jersey" and you'll get about 7,990 results. This piece of news travelled round the world after it was published in Malaysia.

I know that Liverpool couldn't come into Malaysia due to their main sponsorship with Carlsberg. With that sponsorship being changed to Standard Chartered Bank now, Liverpool fans in Malaysia can look forward to seeing them playing in Malaysia during the summer break.

My hope is to see Man Utd vs Liverpool in Malaysia. I believe that the police will have to segregate the opposing fans for real this time.

Man Utd coming to Malaysia again? Bad news now ..... sigh

Nothing against that comment made by the religious council adviser. Even in the christianity circle, I have heard of some people questioning our filial peity towards God when we wear the Pagoda brand singlet. The Pagoda symbol is somehow linked to Buddhism.

I had been 'ridiculed' before by friendly christian friends when their english football team that they support lost to Man Utd. They will quote "they are the red devils and you support them?".

People will have their own thinking and mindset. You can't change it.

Importantly, you know it yourself. I have been supporting Man Utd since 1981 and it's the team that I support, not the devils ....... hehe.

By the way, maybe someone from that religious council can write to Turkish Airlines, MTN (Kuwaiti owners), STC (Saudi Telecom) and Tri Indonesia to withdraw their sponsorships as they are the official sponsors for Man Utd.

At one time, even Malaysia's AirAsia and Ministry of Tourism were one of the many sponsors for Man Utd. As I have heard, Man Utd is quite selective on their sponsors and there's a queue actually just to have your brand name being displayed.

It seems that the football teams of Brazil, Portugal, Serbia, Barcelona and Norway may not be encouraged to be supported as the crests on the football jerseys carry images of the cross.

And should muslims or christian employees resign from their companies where bosses or main shareholders profess religions not of their own? The answer simple is very simple actually. Only human beings make it difficult.
Tags: Manchester United, Man Utd, Football Jersey, Red Devils, Religion

Paul The Octopus Has Chosen Again

Just before the the final game of the 2010 World Cup, Paul The Octopus went to work and decided to choose Spain instead of the team that I supported. And how true it was. Seeing the unbelievable psychic power that it possesses, the politicians in Malaysia from both camps, decided to kidnap Paul and brought him back to Malaysia to conduct a once and for all kind of selection.

Our politicians trusted Paul more than the voters?????

Well, looks Paul has done it again. He has chosen Pakatan Rakyat this time. With the next general election due on 2013, will Paul's prediction be correct again?

Tags: Barisan Nasional, Pakatan Rakyat, Paul The Octopus

Wayne Rooney & John Terry to Star in a Movie

With England out of the 2010 World Cup, their footballers (also regarded as superstars now) have been roped in by the movie industry to star in a new movie. It's based on a true story and most of us may know the storyline as well.I'm sure you would agree on the movie title which fits the actual storyline too. Enjoy it!
Tags: Wayne Rooney, John Terry, Fabio Capello, Steven Gerrard, Frank Lampard, Robert Green, Out Of Africa

Brilliant Conversation Philosophically

An Atheist Professor of Philosophy was speaking to his Class on the problem Science has with GOD, the Almighty. He asked one of his new Christian students to stand and..

Professor : You are a Christian, aren't you, son?
Student : Yes, sir.
Professor : So, you believe in GOD?
Student : Absolutely, sir.
Professor : Is GOD good?
Student : Sure.
Professor : Is GOD all powerful?
Student : Yes.
Professor : My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to GOD to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But GOD didn't. How is this GOD good then? Hmm?

(Student was silent)

Professor : You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella. Is GOD Good?
Student : Yes.
Professor : Is Satan good?
Student : No.
Professor : Where does Satan come from?
Student : From...GOD...
Professor : That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student : Yes.
Professor : Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And GOD did make everything. Correct?
Student : Yes.
Professor : So who created evil?

(Student did not answer)

Professor : Is there Sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the World, don't they?
Student : Yes, sir.
Professor : So, who created them?

(Student had no answer)

Professor : Science says you have 5 Senses you use to Identify and Observe the World around you. Tell me, son ... have you ever seen GOD?
Student : No, sir.
Professor : Tell us if you have ever heard your GOD?
Student : No, sir.
Professor : Have you ever Felt your GOD, Tasted your GOD, Smelt your GOD? Have you ever had any Sensory Perception of GOD for that matter?
Student : No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Professor : Yet you still believe in him?
Student : Yes.
Professor : According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student : Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor : Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.

Student : Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Professor : Yes.
Student : And is there such a thing as Cold?
Professor : Yes.
Student : No, sir. There isn't...

(The lecture theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)

Student : Sir, you can have Lots of Heat, even More Heat, Superheat, Mega Heat, White Heat, a Little Heat or No Heat. But we don't have anything called Cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is No Heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as Cold. Cold is only a Word we use to describe the Absence of Heat. We cannot Measure Cold. Heat is Energy. Cold is Not the Opposite of Heat, sir, just the Absence of it.

(There was pin-drop dilence in the lecture theatre)

Student : What about Darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as Darkness?
Professor : Yes. What is Night if there isn't Darkness?
Student : You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the Absence of Something.
You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light ... but if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and its called Darkness, isn't it? In reality, Darkness isn't. If it is, you would be able to make Darkness Darker, wouldn't you?
Professor : So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student : Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor : Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student : Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a Good GOD and a Bad GOD. You are viewing the Concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can't even explain a Thought. It uses Electricity and Magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view Death as the Opposite of Life is to be ignorant of the fact that Death cannot exist as a Substantive Thing. Death is Not the Opposite of Life: just the Absence of it Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your Students that they evolved from a Monkey?
Professor : If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes, of course, I do.
Student : Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)

Student : Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and Cannot even prove that this Process is an On-Going Endeavor, are you not teaching your Opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?

(The class was in uproar)

Student : Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?

(The class broke out into laughter)

Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the Established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have No Brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)

Professor : I guess you'll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student : That is it sir ... Exactly! The Link between Man & GOD is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving.

That student was Albert Einstein.
Tags: Atheist, Albert Einstein, Faith, Christian, Science, Established Rules of Empirical, Premise of Duality, Philosophical Premise, Professor of Philosophy

Fire Alarm

In a large multinational company..............

A fire alarm rang at 4pm in a large office when almost all employees were in office (approx. 5,000). As usual the entire office was evacuated within 3 minutes & all employees gathered outside the office in the designated area waiting for further announcement.

The Security Officer in charge made the following announcement:-
"Dear employees - with sincere regret I have been asked to announce that for many of you it will be your last evacuation drill. Due to the recession the company is laying off almost 50% of its employees. So when this announcement finishes, I ask all of you to move back into the building and if your swipe card does not work then it means you have been laid off in which case you will not be allowed inside and all your belongings will be couriered to you by tomorrow.

The company has used this innovative approach as we didn't want to fill up the email box with lay-off mails and good bye mails in thousands & also to avoid any fight inside the office and the consequent security issue for all staff.

Hope you have had a rewarding career with us and all the best ahead.

Please move back in & try your luck".
Tags: Fire Alarm, Evacuation Drill, Lay Off